How Do You Plan a Secular or Humanist Funeral?
By CRYSTAL BAI •
The short answer: A secular or humanist funeral honors a life fully without religious content — centering on personal story, human love, shared memory, and community rather than prayer, scripture, or clergy, and can be deeply meaningful for non-religious families.
What Is a Secular or Humanist Funeral?
A secular funeral — sometimes called a humanist ceremony, celebration of life, or non-religious memorial — is a funeral or memorial service that focuses entirely on the person who died, their relationships, and their legacy, without religious content including prayers, scripture, clergy invocations, or theological frameworks about afterlife. These services have grown significantly as more Americans identify as religiously unaffiliated.
Who Officiates a Secular Funeral?
A secular funeral can be officiated by a humanist celebrant (trained through the American Humanist Association or Humanist Society), a secular funeral officiant, a civil celebrant, a trusted friend or family member, or a professional funeral celebrant specializing in personalized ceremonies. The officiant facilitates the service but draws all content from the life story of the deceased rather than religious texts.
Structure of a Secular Memorial Service
A typical secular memorial might include: a welcome and setting of intention by the officiant; a life tribute sharing the biographical story of the deceased; open sharing or eulogies from family and friends; readings from literature, poetry, or the deceased's own words; music meaningful to the person; a moment of silence or collective meditation; and a closing charge to the community. The order is flexible and fully customizable.
Secular Readings and Music
Secular funerals often feature readings from poetry (Mary Oliver, Rumi, Walt Whitman, Pablo Neruda), literature (Alice Walker, Toni Morrison), philosophy, science writing (Carl Sagan's Pale Blue Dot passage is widely used), or the deceased's own written words. Music choices span classical, folk, jazz, rock — whatever was meaningful to the person who died. Favorite songs played at the beginning and end create an intimate, personal atmosphere.
Burial and Disposition Options
Secular families often gravitate toward environmentally resonant disposition options: natural/green burial in a meadow cemetery without embalming; aquamation (water cremation); body donation to science; tree pods; or standard cremation with scattering in a meaningful natural location. None of these require religious affiliation. A death doula or end-of-life planner can help research options in the family's region.
Unitarian Universalist Funerals
Unitarian Universalist (UU) congregations offer a middle path — a community with a spiritual and ethical focus that explicitly welcomes atheists, agnostics, humanists, and people of all religious backgrounds. UU ministers are trained to officiate ceremonies that are theologically pluralistic and can be adapted to almost any family's needs.
Frequently Asked Questions
Can you have a funeral without religion?
Yes. Secular and humanist funerals focus entirely on the person who died — their story, relationships, and legacy — without prayer, clergy, or scripture. They can be deeply meaningful and are increasingly common as more families are religiously unaffiliated.
Who officiates a non-religious funeral?
A humanist celebrant, civil celebrant, secular funeral officiant, or trusted friend or family member can officiate. Humanist Society and American Humanist Association both train and certify humanist celebrants.
What readings are used at secular funerals?
Popular secular readings include Mary Oliver poetry, Carl Sagan prose, Walt Whitman, Pablo Neruda, Alice Walker, Toni Morrison, and the deceased's own written words. Readings are chosen for personal resonance rather than religious tradition.
What is the difference between a secular funeral and a celebration of life?
The terms are often used interchangeably. A celebration of life typically emphasizes joy and storytelling over formal mourning ritual, while a secular or humanist funeral may include a wider range of emotional tones while remaining non-religious in content.
Can a Unitarian Universalist minister officiate a secular funeral?
Yes. UU ministers are trained to officiate theologically pluralistic ceremonies that welcome atheists, agnostics, and humanists. A UU memorial service can be fully non-theistic while still offering community and spiritual depth.
Renidy connects grieving families with compassionate death doulas and AI-powered funeral planning tools. Try our free AI funeral planner or find a death doula near you.